as days go by...

What fresh hell is this?

My upstairs neighbors sound like a herd of elephants. Seriously, these people never sit down, and their kids run non stop. What the hell happened to common courtesy?

With a heavy heart and a cloudy mind…

Seven month’s ago today, I lost my job, and this weekend, I have to give up my home. This has been devastating for me. We bought this house nearly seven years ago, our first home. There are so many memories here, and I am overcome by a sea of emotions right now. My husband keeps telling me to see this as a fresh start, but that’s not how I’m wired, I see this as an epic failure.

I am exhausted from a lengthy battle with the bank, and I want to scream from a mountain how much I hate Bank of America. I was two months ahead on payments,my house was on the market and I was begging for options, only to be told “we can’t help you until you fall behind.” Once I fell behind, I was sent through and denied for three seperate programs, all the while still begging to make partial payments. “Don’t pay anything, it will halt all progress we’ve made.”

During all of this, I found work (2 jobs) , and my husband got his promotion. So I called and said hey guys, can we make a payment and a half to get caught up quicker? Only to be told… we would have taken partial payment months ago, now we will only accept the entire amount up front.

I don’t want this to be a pity post, but maybe this will help someone else in their journey. Now that I’ve bared my soul, I need to get back to packing.

Overjoyed

I got the call i’ve been waiting on for three weeks yesterday. I have a new full time job waiting on me to arrive! It will be a bit different from my old job, but I look forward to the challenge, and 40 hour weeks again, and health insurance. ( they pay 1/2 ya’ll, even on the family plan!!!)

Now I have to shop because old job’s uniforms will not cut it….

Job hunting and self loathing

you guys, I lost my job Friday. Totally unexpected and seemingly bullshit all at once. I have never been without work, and I am so freaked out I can’t stand it.  I have spent every waking minute searching ads, updating my resume, handing it out and asking for applications.  How do you explain why you’re unemployed when you really don’t know why?

I could use any spare positive thoughts/energy/prayers you might have laying around.

Perspective

I have an amazing friend who is one of the best people I know. Her laughter is contagious, her smile lights up a room, her heart is huge. She is a strong woman who has spent her life battling juvenile diabetes. She has fought this disease with all her might, all while raising awareness and money for research to hopefully find a cure. She just learned she has to have a kidney and pancreas transplant.

While I am terrified for her, I know in my heart she will face this hurdle as she has faced all the rest, head on and full force.  Times like this make me realize that my problems are not that bad, and to be grateful for each day. 

Highlight of the day…

finding a dress for the upcoming wedding i’m in. Even better, it was at a thrift store where all clothes were 50% off. Dress retails for $120, I paid…. $6.50!!!!

Where does the line start for a new life?

I am at my breaking point. Between work drama, trying to sell my house & waiting on my husbands promotion to go through I have enough on my plate. Then, I get a call informing me I am expected to plan and participate in a wedding on the 19th.  I am not a supporter of this union, and have no real desire to attend, however it is family and I really don’t have a choice.

So if anyone has an extra prayer/good karma/ positive energy to spare, I could sure use it.  If you happen to know of a good job available in NC, someone needing to buy a house, or a helpful suggestion for what color dress to wear when the bride (wearing gold) hasn’t specified a color choice please let me know.